Filling in the Blanks

That's pretty much how I feel.  You can't post without a title, and I don't have one.
 
So.  It's the end of October, I'm well into my current project (per this blog) and am trying to get myself back into the frame of mind to write up movies (per the other). 

I cannot show you the progress I've made on my current drawing because it's a commission, and thus private.  Perhaps when I'm  finished my client will grant me permission to do so.  I will need to find a resource that can scan images of that size.  What I can show you is a selection of it that will demonstrate part of the process that went into its preparation.

See, I'm working on  an a tablet that's 18x24".  A tablet that size is a little unwieldy for my current messy work environment.  One obstacle has been transferring the image with its increase in size.  Umm - this might be a repetition of information I've posted earlier, so bear with me. 

First, my client wishes a drawing based off a photograph, which I have a hard print of and a scan of for my screen.  He is wearing a hat, which he wishes removed.  He has another photograph of a different size, resolution, etc., in which he is not wearing a hat.  It's close enough: with one of those graphics programs I'm not  a whiz at, I was able to isolate the top of his head (!), flip it, resize it, re-orient it, paste it, and make it a semi-transparent blend.  After that it went up on my 1600x900 screen and I copied it onto tracing paper.  With one of those lightboxe devices I traced it again onto a 9x12 page. 

Here's the tricky part, and time-consuming.  As I have no overhead projector, I was forced to upscale the image using The Grid Method.  Do artists call it The Grid Method?  I have no idea.  Fuck it, I'm going to.  The Grid Method is something I read about as a child but have never used before, and sounds  simple.  Basically, you map out a grid  over the desired image with a ruler, then create a similar but larger-scaled grid on the surface you'll be using for the actual piece.  Below is the donor grid over the initial  tracing:

Each square is a quarter of an inch, IRL.  I doubled that for the actual drawing.  Like I said, the above image is only a portion of the  actual picture,  it's been enlarged and had the contrast significantly increased.  Notice the lines are a little sloppy...that's not a problem, it's what's inside them that counts.  The bigger hurdle is erasing them once you're done with them.  I'm needing to get a sturdier eraser, if you look closely enough at the peper the final drawing is on you can still make them out.  Stand away from it and they  disappear, but I'm not happy with it yet.  Then again, I'm not done yet.  It will take practice and experimentin with other leads before I can draw a grid softly with ease.

Keeping track of the info from square to square also takes concentration.  It's not as easy as it looks if you've mapped out an extensive area.  All of the above process took some eight hours to complete, bringing me to the point where I could start in on actually drawing instead of prepping.

As I related in the  last post, my drawing of Jesseca  almost threw me when it came to capturing her facial expression - those changes in shading.  I believe what gave me trouble was the difference in luminosity between the screen and the hardcopy,  but  even so the wary  thought lingered that I was out of practice.  That has yet to pay into my current work - we'll see.  There are choices to be made in tones that I haven't gotten to yet.
 

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My friend Scott may have one or two commissions.  One is a photo in his possession, and another is one he wants to arrange. Both are family portraits.  I'm looking forward to them once the current one is completed.

Facebook is, I suppose, a necessary evil for getting me work.  Also, Jesseca shares fun stuff with me, as well as social content worth  forwarding.    Otherwise I try to stay off of it.  I had hoped  FB would help me reconnect with Dana, and instead it's turned out to be one more chance to get burned by her.  By this point she's read what I was trying to reach her with, and I have to conclude it didn't make a difference.  She might have said "please wait" or "I'm not ready to talk to you" or even 'I don't know if I can do this".  But she has said nothing and that speaks so much  louder.  More blanks  to fill in: what do I trust, the real-life evidence or my fading hopes, promising dreams that are months old and unrepeated?

The holiday season has begun.  Days in which I must fend off lows are increasing in number but not severity.  I'm getting by.  I have to steel myself now, though, against the certainty that it will have been another year I didn't hear from her..

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When I make a library run I always stop at Goodwill to look for DVDs, music, and books.  Today I picked up Madeleine L'Engle's "A Wrinkle in Time".  I read that and "A Wind in the Door" back when I was in grade school, and was taken with the soulful fantasy of them.  Now I see there's a quintet of books.  I'm hoping to rediscover some of that again, perhaps find some inspiration in it (or them, with luck).